If you needed a gentle reminder, here it is: sex is about SO much more than orgasms. It's about the intimacy, the sensations and the heat you generate with the other person—it's a journey, seriously! Plus, when data shows that less than 20% of us generally have an orgasm with penetration, it's even more reason to put less pressure to have an orgasm during penetrative sex — a climax simply isn't the end-all-be-all of partnered sex. So stop feeling pressure to O every single time you get in bed with your partner! Not only is it not likely realistic, it might make things harder for you to actually get there. Y'know, by the same law of nature that worrying about falling asleep does not actually help with falling asleep.
Erotic Instructions
Lie down, straddling a pillow with a strong-ass wand vibrator on top of it (or under it, if you need something waaaay more subtle). Ride the pillow, tilting your hips up for simultaneous deep penetration from behind (either hole. Your holes, your rules.)
Why You'll Love It
If you're a humper, the rumbly vibes of a wand plus deep penetration might be ~exactly~ what you need.
the wetland adventure
Erotic Instructions
If shower sex doesn't quite do it for you, put a detachable showerhead into service to attend to you. Stand, holding on to something very very sturdy. With the other hand, guide the water steam to your clit. Use a diffuse setting for gentler stimulation or go with a hardcore single stream for more a more pleasure/pain effect.
Why You'll Love It
A showerhead is a surprisingly good sex toy.
Erotic Instructions
You can absolutely change regular old missionary by adding a vibrating cock ring. If your partner has a penis, it will keep them harder for a longer time and the bonus buzziness will hit you exactly where you need it. (That would be you, clit.)
Why You'll Love It
The built-in clit stimulation can be a complete game changer for P-in-V.
Bonus:Those Positions you could use couple vibrator to enhance your sex felling.
Erotic Instructions
If you're determined to try and make it happen with penetration, try the Coital Alignment Technique (CAT) for maximum clitoral stimulation. Your partner lies on top, sliding up further toward your head and instead of thrusting, you slide and rub against each other. If they have a penis/strap-on, insert just the tip so you can slide against their shaft and pubic bone. (If you're going vulva-to-vulva, you're GTG.)
Why You'll Love It
The added friction of aligning, coitally, means more clitoral stimulation for you aka upping your odds of orgasm to the max.
Erotic Instructions:
Super deep penetration plus strong-ass clit stim? Yes, please. Doggie gives you lots of room for wielding whatever toy you want, no matter how big. Want to break out the giant wand vibe? Do. It. The dual stimulation is amaaaaaazing.
Why You'll Love It
The added power of a wand vibe means you can do the least possible and still have the best odds of an orgasm. All the space underneath you during doggie gives you tons of space for normally unwieldy toys.
Erotic Instructions
Squat over your partner and face them with your knees spread wide. With your feet planted on the floor, roll and thrust your hips. You can switch between pressing your knees tightly together for a tighter-feeling fit, then opening wide so your partner can rub your clit.
Why You’ll Love It
The stance feels super primal and powerful, plus you’ll get dual inner and outer stimulation at your own damn pace. Have your partner try lubing up two fingers and sliding them along each side of your clit with each thrust.
Erotic Instructions
Lie back on a bed with your knees up by your chest and your hips at the edge of the bed. Your partner sits (they need to be comfortable ’cause they’re gonna be there awhile), gently massaging lube around your vulva. One hand is for rubbing circles around your clitoris and the other is for curling a finger inside your vagina, rubbing and tapping on the upper wall about an inch or so in.
Why You’ll Love It
It’s the most direct way to simultaneous clitoral and internal stimulation. And even if you tend to be a clit-focused kind of person, the internal stim will enhance it and can help you have an extra-strong, deeper-feeling orgasm.
Erotic Instructions
Put that yoga class downward-facing dog to good use! Get down on all fours with your partner kneeling behind you and have them plunge inside you, grabbing your butt for balance. This tight, firm angle (plus some rubbing or vibrator use on your clit) could open up a whole new orgasmic world.
Why You’ll Love It
Sure, this isn’t the easiest lazy-Sunday-sex pose, but that internal stim is HOT. Also, there’s something very primal about doing the deed from behind that brings out the animal in even the most mild-mannered partner.
Erotic Instructions
Lie on your back by the edge of a pool or dock so your butt’s just hanging over the edge above the water. Have your partner stand in the water, facing you, then lift your legs and rest them on their shoulders as they either go down on or enter you. (Why not both, in that order?) You can hold on to the edge of the pool or dock for support.
Why You’ll Love It
Your partner has a full frontal view. So up the optic ante (and channel your inner sex goddess) by caressing your breasts and tummy, which will give them even more eye candy.
Erotic Instructions
If you’re bored with the standard cowgirl pose, this position is a fun, frisky way to mix things up. Your partner lies on their back, one leg outstretched and the other bent, knee pointing upward. You straddle their body sideways with your back turned slightly to their face, and use their knee for support and balance as you rock back and forth and up and down.
Why You’ll Love It
This torrid two-in-one move is all about your ecstasy. The steady rocking motion and thrusting create a pleasure buildup that primes you for the Big O (and having that knee support means you can go faster and deeper than normal). Plus, if you’re feeling generous, you can throw in a li’l thigh massage for your partner.
Erotic Instructions
Every couple knows how to assume the spoon: Lie on your side with your partner behind you. Keep both of your torsos in this doze pose and lift your top leg. Have them shift their lower body into a half-kneeling position, entering you from behind.
Why You’ll Love It
This passion pose gives you the best of both worlds! The half-doggy-style, half-spooning hybrid combines the cozy intimacy of lying side by side with simultaneous rubbing and penetration. Nothing beats having them hold you tight while taking you higher. Give them a gentle reminder that both their hands are free, guiding them to caress your curves and stimulate your clitoris. Up their ante by reaching behind and fondling them as they thrust.
Erotic Instructions
If you love The Sensual Spoon but want some anal play, try this. Lie on your side, using a rabbit-style vibrator for clitoral and internal stimulation. Your partner assumes the big-spoon position behind you to enter via door number two, so to speak. As usual with all things anal: Use a fuck ton of lube, go incredibly slow, and don’t go any further than feels comfortable.
Why You’ll Love It
Dual stimulation is already amazing, but adding anal penetration to the mix can be a total game changer.
